Comments on: Putting Climbers First to Create Climbing We Can Believe In

By: jeremy

jeremy — Thu, 06 Nov 2008 17:08:12 +0000

I see you have a number of 7 there in Iowa. No matter what we are not going to have “high quality climbing areas” The likes of California.

We have our access problems, but we also just got a great new gym opening up in Central Iowa. Which I think is the only was to address number.

By: sweatpants

sweatpants — Wed, 05 Nov 2008 22:46:10 +0000

u can have nothing as you will be banished to chosspiles and terrible talus landings with no organic pad to pertect you. eatItsOcktard

By: gr8belayr

gr8belayr — Wed, 05 Nov 2008 21:08:20 +0000

The map is a very nice touch. Well written too!

By: sock hands

sock hands — Wed, 05 Nov 2008 19:36:05 +0000

i call dibbs on so ill, the southeast, nc, and the northeast… yall can have this colochoss… done with it

By: John

John — Wed, 05 Nov 2008 18:59:31 +0000

This is hilarious. Except for the fact that California would seceded from the Union.

By: Situner

Situner — Wed, 05 Nov 2008 18:21:11 +0000

Why no mention of Utah? Those clowns have more rock than they know what to do with!?!?

Also, I hereby swear to forward the socktard agenda of all world-class boulders to the newly established “Parker climbing center” to be located in his backyard.

Our agenda calls to enslave “sweatpants” and force him to clean dog poops to ensure safe landings in this new utopia.

Bow or be crushed.

By: sweatpants

sweatpants — Tue, 04 Nov 2008 23:52:17 +0000

i dont mean damp holds i mean crumble in your face sandstone in your eyes while you fall on your face and cry.

By: sock hands

sock hands — Tue, 04 Nov 2008 23:30:29 +0000

my interest in sport climbing is only to wire the classics so that when i flood the earth to create DWS opportunity, i will be able to sandbag at will…. i walks up “oh! what is this? looks neat!” and send that shiz in you foolish clownfaced faces.

and finally, you know that wet holds cannot keep me down. heat. that’s my only enemy. heat and work. clearly, heat is a greater foe.

By: sweatpants

sweatpants — Tue, 04 Nov 2008 22:39:15 +0000

there is also a solid chance that my finishing move will involve a swift kick to the ankle… I’m not trying to give away my secrets but i think you should know what ur getting into.

By: sweatpants

sweatpants — Tue, 04 Nov 2008 22:35:11 +0000

u are soooo in trouble… dont think i wont ‘thumb pin’ you just cause you’re a girl. This V.P. candidate takes no mercy

By: You Know Who I 'Am'

You Know Who I 'Am' — Tue, 04 Nov 2008 22:25:25 +0000

It’s on!

By: Narc

Narc — Tue, 04 Nov 2008 22:06:05 +0000

Oh, don’t you worry. I’ll be blowing up all those oversized cracks at Vedauwoo to turn them into lowball boulder problems in no time!

And maybe I know something nobody else knows about the make-up of El Cap. Ever though of that???

By: sweatpants

sweatpants — Tue, 04 Nov 2008 22:05:28 +0000

I’ll thumb wrestle for it.

By: Kate C

Kate C — Tue, 04 Nov 2008 22:01:49 +0000

Ha, somebody got to it before me. I read “El Cap Limestone” in my reader and spit out my coke. Now my keyboard is sticky, thank you.

Funny! You can have all the boulders on the Front Range. I’m certainly not using them!

By: You Know Who I 'Am'

You Know Who I 'Am' — Tue, 04 Nov 2008 21:55:42 +0000

Narc’s VP…I think Mrs. Narc is a sure call for that position…we’ll see sweatpants

By: sweatpants

sweatpants — Tue, 04 Nov 2008 21:04:00 +0000

@sockhands… remember in the other thread when you mentioned sport climbing being ‘rad’. As Narc’s vice president i vow to never forget socktard’s inexcusable dab EVER, I will bring it up constantly, and also banish him to a perma-soaked crag where he will be tormented by unclimbable rock for the rest of eternity… without fritters.

That’s what you get for making a sport climbing dab.

vicepresident4eva

By: Narc

Narc — Tue, 04 Nov 2008 20:00:58 +0000

embarassing rock type dab corrected

By: Craig B

Craig B — Tue, 04 Nov 2008 19:49:46 +0000

Rocks are not like wealth, they should not be spread around. Peagravel makes me sad.

If you use my computer to submit blog entries I may have to use your user name.

By: Luke

Luke — Tue, 04 Nov 2008 19:43:52 +0000

El Cap limestone… We are definitely in trouble! The Capitan isn’t going anywhere. California will secede from the union!

By: sock hands

sock hands — Tue, 04 Nov 2008 19:20:18 +0000

can you imagine california boulders placed in alpine meadows, versus talus, in colorado?

i say screw you all, my platform is facist, and i’m taking all the rock and putting it in colorado… evans for summer, parker for fall/winter/spring.

thriller/theforce will be my new fence with the back yard neighbors, though it is twice the size of our back yards combined… still working out that detail…

‘drive on’ will be right next to punani at c-wood.

dominator will be located under any number of death choss clifflines so that it stays nice and dry despite sleet rain snow

you bitches will all have to bow to parker, center of the climbing universe!!!!!!!!!!

also, many classic routes will be re-located to the shoals that lie 200 yards off shore in lakes ontario and erie. buffalo and rochester will rise again as the most thriving metropolises of the new world.

deep water soloing from a floatilla of party boats anchored at a safe distance. buffalo beer guts, male and female, tanning slowly i the sun like rotisserie turkey..

HEAVEN, BITHCHES, HEAVEN

By: sweatpants

sweatpants — Tue, 04 Nov 2008 18:29:23 +0000

either way i need to be given the power to institute mandatory sweatpants and apple fritter days… do the right thing Narc

By: Narc

Narc — Tue, 04 Nov 2008 18:26:43 +0000

yes, quite coincidental which made me laugh at the time…it had been in the works prior to our conversation

By: sweatpants

sweatpants — Tue, 04 Nov 2008 18:25:14 +0000

Hilarious… i just sent u that email about sending some of wisconsin’s rock down to here so it would actually get climbed on… where u already writing this piece when i said that? if not i want half credit and an advising spot that outranks sock hands so i can make him get me coffee and dryer sheets on a daily basis as well as force him to eat fritters at a sickening rate, thus fattening him up and opening the door for world domination…

By: Tom Markiewicz

Tom Markiewicz — Tue, 04 Nov 2008 18:11:28 +0000

Since you are obviously running an anti-Colorado platform, I must vote against you. Stay with your cows in Wisconsin